Rainbows and Butterflies
by letthestarsfall
Summary: AU 'Life is not always Rainbows and Butterflies' What would have happened if Zoe had gone ahead with adopting Sharice? ZoexNick
1. Cupcakes and Sunshine

Disclaimer: I don't own Casualty or Ruth and Jay would be back together already! (as would Zoe and Nick!)

_Hey everyone! I have been promising to write a Zoe/nick fic for ages so finally I had an idea so I decided to write it up! It starts from a day or so after Series 23 episode 33 and will be AU from then on sort of answering the question What if Zoe went on to adopt Sharice! _

**Rainbows and Butterflies **

**Chapter 1 – Cupcakes and Sunshine **

Five years ago if anyone had asked Zoe where she thought she would be now she would definitely not have said covered in flour wearing an apron and dancing around the kitchen to the cheesiest pop music she had ever heard with a seven year old!

Zoe had never even imagined herself as the motherly type. Even when her brother had had his daughter she hadn't felt her maternal urges suddenly forcing her to want her own family and children, she never knew what to say or do around them and the children themselves always seemed to take an instant dislike to her no matter what she did anyway. She had long ago abandoned the idea of settling down and becoming a mother so the fact that she had just signed the adoption papers to make her the legal guardian of seven year old Sharice was a bit of a surprise, even to her.

"Zoe! Zoe! Look!" Sharice held up the cupcake she had just finished decorating covered in pink icing and multi-coloured sprinkles.

"Wow now that is a work of art!" Zoe found herself beaming proudly as Sharice delicately placed the cupcake on the plate.

"What colour are you doing?" Sharice asked excitedly

"Purple." Zoe smiled showing her the icing

Not every day with Sharice was cupcakes and sunshine. Zoe had met Sharice when she had treated her mother, Abby in the emergency department after her father Finn had beaten Abby senseless, she had tried to help Abby but she had proved that she could not be trusted so Zoe had had to cut ties with the troubled young mum. Then Sharice turned up to see Zoe at the department, Zoe had thought it was one of Abby's games so sent the seven year old on her way but it hadn't been, a worried Abby had turned up after finding Sharice missing. Zoe couldn't help but feel guilty for not believing the seven year old but as Abby hurried off to find her with Finn in tow Zoe had to get back to work. Two hours later and a bloodied and beaten Abby was being dragged through into the emergency department. No sign of Sharice. Zoe had no idea what happened, it appeared there had been some sort of fight between Abby and Finn but before Zoe knew it Abby had arrested and she was desperately doing chest compressions trying to bring her back, ten minutes in Nick took over and kicked her out of resus so she decided she had to try and find Sharice for Abby. She got a lift from the police to the scrap yard where they had been found, they had hurried around the scrap yard hunting for the little girl and to Zoe's pure relief she had found her in the back of a car – out cold but alive.

By the time they had gotten Sharice to Holby Abby had gone. Zoe could hardly believe her ears when Nick said those words. She had told so many relatives the same thing, she had never been on the receiving end and it hit like a blow to the chest. Nick had ushered her out of paeds resus whilst he treated Sharice.

Zoe felt a sense of duty, of responsibility towards the little girl who no had no one from that moment on. Sharice had recovered well apart from missing Abby, Zoe guessed that she was going to take a long time a long time to stop mourning the loss of her mother. Sharice had initially been resistant but eventually Zoe had befriended the devastated little girl again, gained her trust back and found herself saying that she was going to look after her.

God knows where that idea came from. Zoe didn't have a maternal bone in her body but Sharice seemed to have found her way into Zoe's heart and Zoe couldn't get her back out again.

"Ok trouble." Zoe smiled as the last of the cupcakes were decorated "You can watch an hour of television and then it is time for bed!"

"Ok Zoe!" Sharice smiled

For a child that had been through so much Sharice was surprisingly cheery. Zoe said she was a little fighter and Sharice proved her right on a regular basis.

It was surprisingly how well Zoe had settled into life as a 'Mum' she enjoyed Sharice's company and her flat seemed so much more welcoming with the addition of a small child however Zoe's job meant that she had to rely on babysitters. Just as things had settled down the day before Sharice's babysitter had to stop looking after the other children and focus on her own daughter leaving Zoe in to lurch completely. She had managed to get a day off today to look after Sharice but tomorrow the only option she was looking at right now was taking Sharice into the emergency department with her.

"Zoe come look at the kittens!" Sharice's voice cut through Zoe's thoughts as she put the last of the bowls in the washing up.

"Don't you be getting ideas!" Zoe joked as she pulled off her apron and wandered over to the living room area of her flat where Sharice was staring intently at the television.

Sharice felt like the missing piece in her life and having gotten used to having the small girl in her life Zoe couldn't imagine her life without her.

"Can I have one?" Sharice looked up at Zoe with her big innocent blue eyes

"Definitely not! You create enough mess on your own!" Zoe laughed as ruffled Sharice's hair over the back of the sofa.

"Maybe when I'm bigger? Like when I'm 8?" Sharice suggested

Zoe laughed at her persistence

"Maybe." She agreed with a small smile.

Coming around the edge of the sofa Zoe settled down on her favourite end, Sharice immediately shuffled over and snuggled up against her. It was strange but this was the happiest she had ever been. Sharice was everything Zoe had never imagined her life becoming but at the same time Zoe couldn't bear the idea of her life without her, it seemed almost pointless. Zoe smiled happily, she may never have believed it but looking after Sharice was turning out to be the best thing that had ever happened to her.


	2. Good as gold

**Rainbows and Butterflies **

**Chapter 2 – Good as gold **

"So you promise to be as good as gold?" Zoe repeated as she looked in her rear view mirror at the little girl playing with her doll and her plastic stethoscope in the back seat.

"As good as super shiny gold!" Sharice smiled sweetly.

They day was not off to a good start. Sharice had not been pleased with the idea of coming to work with Zoe she had wanted to spend the day with her grandparents. However her grandparents had gone back up to Scotland to sort some things out as they were planning a move to Holby so couldn't have taken care of Sharice even if Zoe had asked them to. Sharice's grandparents where her last link to her Mum and Zoe knew that was important so she had plenty of time for the older couple but at the same time with the adoption coming through she was slightly glad that she had Sharice to herself for a while to set up their life together properly. Plus Zoe was too proud and she didn't want to rely on their generosity too often, she wanted to prove she could do it.

"I mean it Sharice, Mr Jordan is a bit of a dragon… I'm not really supposed to be bringing you in…" Zoe sighed

"Why couldn't I stay with Nana and Grandad?" Sharice asked bluntly

"Because they are back in Scotland sorting out their house you know that!" Zoe pointed out and Sharice sighed looking out the window

"Will they be back? Mummy didn't come back…" Sharice trailed off

"They will. They are moving nice and close so that you can go visit them more often!" Zoe said reassuringly "But if we are going to make this work and I am going to be looking after you we need to be able to cope on our own anyway right?" she asked the little girl

"Yes." Sharice nodded fiddling with the plastic stethoscope

"You enjoy living with me right?" Zoe asked worriedly as she parked up and turned to face Zoe

"Of course!" Sharice looked "You're the best almost Mummy ever." She beamed slightly

"You wouldn't prefer to live with you Nana and Grandad…?" Zoe asked unsure of herself for a minute doubting whether Sharice wanted to come and live with her "Because the adoption isn't final yet and it's your choice Sharice…" she added a hint of nerves in her voice

"I love Nana and Grandad." Sharice pointed out "But they get a bit boring after a while..." She confessed in a loud whisper and Zoe chuckled slightly

"Come on trouble." She smiled undoing her seatbelt and opening the door

Sharice unbuckled her own seatbelt and eagerly sprang from the car.

"You are going to behave right?" Zoe said as she locked the car and looked down into Sharice's big blue eyes.

"Of course Zoe!" Sharice grinned

Maybe this wasn't going to be such a good idea Zoe sighed as she took the little girl's hand and lead her towards the department.

"Noel!" Zoe smiled as she spotted the receptionist as they entered the department "How do you feel like doing me a massive favour?"

"What…? No…." Noel shook his head looking down at the small child "I have to work too!"

"She'll be as good as gold won't you Sharice?" Zoe looked down at Sharice who smiled cheekily

"Good as gold!" Sharice smiled as she repeated Zoe

"Thanks Noel." Zoe said bluntly giving Noel absolutely no choice in the matter

"Oh come on Zoe!" Noel sighed as Zoe ruffled Sharice's hair and headed off he pulled a face and looked down at the child "Do you like action figures?" he asked hopefully

"They're rubbish." Sharice pulled a face

"Drawing?" Noel tried

"That's for babies I'm seven years old!" Sharice folded her arms

Noel sighed. This was going to be a tough day.

"Late again Doctor Hanna?" Zoe turned to see Nick looking around the edge of the staffroom door as she threw her handbag into her locker

"No just not on time!" Zoe winced as she turned around to look into Nick's eyes

"Let me guess, small brown haired thing with a high pitch voice hold you up?" he asked

"No, not at all and I'm getting to work now ok?" Zoe sighed

"Good. I hope that taking care of, Sharice is it?..." Zoe nodded as Nick paused to check he was right "…taking care of Sharice won't affect your ability when you are at work? You are one of the best doctors in this emergency department but I need you fully focused on the job!" Nick pointed out simply

"Of course not!" Zoe immediately defended herself crossing her fingers and hiding them behind her locker door "I am a good Doctor I don't let my personal life affect my professional life!" She said confidently

"And let's keep it that way!" Nick winked

Zoe blushed slightly as Nick vanished. She was doing exactly what she had just promised Nick she wouldn't do right now. Letting her personal life invade on her professional life, but she could hide Sharice from him, it wouldn't be too hard and anyway how much trouble could a seven year old get up to in an emergency department anyway?


	3. The Littlest Doctor

**Rainbows and Butterflies**

**Chapter 3 – The Littlest Doctor **

Sharice watched Noel carefully her big blue eyes filled with curiosity.

"Why are you doing that?" she asked innocently leaning on the reception desk the pens and paper he had fetched for her lying untouched.

Noel looked up from the patients files he was copying into the system.

"So that if the patient comes in again we know why there were in here today." He explained simply

"Why?" Sharice asked

"So that the doctors can find out what they need to know." Noel added as she typed in the next patients address.

"Why?" She asked again

"Because I have too." Noel sighed frustrated with the constant questioning

"Why do you have too?" Sharice asked

"Because it's my job." Noel closed the patients file and looked over at the little girl

"That's a boring job." Sharice stated turning away and picking up one of Noels action figures

"Hey put that down!" Noel instantly jumped up protectively

"It's a toy!" She said waving the action figure in the air

"For looking at!" Noel snatched the action figure off he child and held it protectively to his chest "You have to be careful with them."

"That's a rubbish toy." Sharice said simply

Noel pulled a face and then headed over to the counter where a patient was waiting to be checked in.

Sharice swung her legs as she watched Noel placing the toy down close to him and typing what the patient was saying into the computer. She hadn't thought it would be this boring in the hospital she thought Zoe might let her help treat patients but watching the boring receptionist was boring. She picked up her toy stethoscope she hopped down off the chair and took one last look at Noel busy typing on the computer before vanishing through the double doors that she had seen the nurses taking patients through. She'd make her own fun.

Zoe signed off yet another patient as ready to go home and ran her hand through her hair. Her mind was on finding Sharice a baby sitter and wondering if Noel was coping with the feisty seven year old.

"Too much work for you?"

She looked up to see Nick watching her carefully

"Or just been run ragged by a small monster with long brown hair?"

"Neither." Zoe rolled her eyes definitely

"Zoe!" Zoe spun round to see Noel appear from reception looking especially flustered her heart skipped a beat, what had Sharice gotten up too? "Its..." he took one look at who Zoe was stood next to and the warning look in Zoe's eyes and paused rethinking what he was going to say "There's someone on the phone..." He lied

Nick gave both Zoe and Noel a suspicious look as Zoe straightened up.

"I'll be right there Noel." She replied simply.

"Its kind of urgent..." Noel added trying to get across the urgency

"Ok, I said I'll be right there..." she trailed off, Noel shuffled his feet and then headed back off to reception looking a little worried.

"Not a personal call I hope!" Nick said suspiciously

"I doubt it is!" Zoe replied heading off after Noel hoping that Sharice hadn't destroyed the place.

"What do you mean missing?" Zoe said angrily as Noel tried to explain that the seven year old have vanished.

"Well she was here one minute and gone the next..." Noel said shrugging

"She's seven years old!" Zoe sighed "You can't let a seven year old roam freely around the department! Its like letting a bunch of wild cats loose in a bird sanctuary!"

"I'm not a baby sitter!" Noel pointed out "I don't have eyes in the back of my head!"

Zoe rolled her eyes and stormed off in the direction of cubicles. Where the hell could Sharice have gone?

Sharice sneaked through the cubicles. Zoe had told her to stay put but reception was boring, she wanted to watch the doctors and nurses at work. She put the stethoscope around her shoulders and peeked around the curtain of one of the cubicles.

An old man looked over at her and started screaming. She quickly shut the curtain and hurried off to hide behind the nurse's station peeking out she watched one of the nurses go into the cubicle she had just been looking in the calm the patient.

Creeping round the nurses desk she watched as a porter wheeled a patient into another cubicle and she watched a doctor taking a large needle into another cubicle. Fascinated she watched the hustle and bustle of the cubicle area for a minute before she decided to try another cubicle. Sneaking over she peeked inside cubicle five.

"Are you all right there?" the patient, an elderly lady, asked as she spotted the little face peaking around her curtain.

This patient seemed much friendlier than the strange man who started screaming. She nodded and stepped inside.

"What's your name?" the lady asked peering over the bed at her

"Sharice. I'm a doctor!" She said innocently "Look I have a stethoscope!" she held up her toy stethoscope proudly

"Wow!" The elderly patient smiled

"Can I check you over?" Sharice asked excitedly

"Of course you can dear." The woman smiled bemused by the small child's excitement

Sharice stepped up and reached up placing the end of her stethoscope on top of the womans gown. She listened carefully for a minute before announcing her 'findings'

"You need some special medicine and you will be all better in an hour." She nodded

He woman chuckled and then coughed slightly.

"If only all medicine was that efficient!" She smiled "Where is your mummy?" she asked kindly

"She's dead." Sharice said bluntly

"Oh I'm sorry sweetie" The patient said immediately regretting the question

"She is in heaven drinking strawberry milkshakes!" She told the woman

The lady smiled slightly

"I live with Zoe now she's like my new mummy." She explained "she looks after me."

"I see." The elderly lady smiled "Where is Zoe then?"

"She's being a doctor, she brought me with her but left me with the boring receptionist." She pulled a face "I want to treat patients too! I'm a doctor!"

"I see..." the patient began as the curtain flew open

"Mrs Wilmslow..." Nick started as he entered the cubicle before spotting the small child next to her bed. Sharice's eyes widened as she spotted the scary looking older man entering. He looked down and spotted the small child stood next to the patients bed, his looked a little surprised. "Sharice isn't it?" he asked as the shock wore off slightly

Sharice nodded nervously

"She's been checking me over haven't you dear." The patient said simply

"I'm sorry Mrs Wilmslow we do not condone children being left alone in the department..." Nick immediately began to apologise

"It's ok." The patient smiled

"You're the dragon!" Sharice suddenly said with a squeak causing the patient to chuckle

"The dragon?" Nick raised and eyebrow

"Zoe said Mr Jordan is a dragon! If your Mr Jordan that means you're a dragon! Do you breathe flames?" She asked innocently causing further laughed from the patient

"I certainly do not breathe flames!" Nick confirmed

"Can I help and be a doctor too?" Sharice asked innocently as she relaxed in the knowledge Nick was not about to start breathing flames

"If Mrs Wilmslow is ok with that...?" Nick looked at the patient who nodded

Sharice jumped on the spot excitedly

"Can I use your stethoscope?" she asked looking up at him with her innocent bright blue eyes

Nick chuckled slightly and pulled it off from around his shoulders and handed it to the child unable to disappoint the little girl with the big blue eyes.


End file.
